Last week was me and my cute husband’s one year anniversary so I figured I should do a post on what I’ve learned from marriage so far and just my thoughts on this past year. I’ve been thinking back on the past a lot recently, as I tend to do when anniversaries of any kind approach, and it’s strange to feel like I barely recognize the person I was a year ago. The feeling of having changed so monumentally in just 365 days is a weird one. So to document these changes, here are a few things I’ve learned.
- Its all gonna be okay. Like literally, you’ll be fine. Before I got married, I was so scared of the unknown and that there would be things about marriage I wouldn’t be able to handle, or that I’d let my husband down. After countless miserable failures I finally learned that my fears were true, I would let him down and I would mess up and struggle with things. But it wasn’t the end of the world. Sometimes when we go into new things like marriage we expect everything to be perfect, and we place so much pressure on ourselves to do things right and to be a good spouse, but what we have to realize is that life is never perfect, but as long as we keep trying day to day to be the best people we can be, and to make things better when we mess up, it will be fine! When you get married to someone who truly loves you and cares for you as a person, they will forgive you and still love you and everything will be okay.
2. Communicating is hard, but it’s worth it. Everyone says that communication is key in a relationship, and it’s absolutely true, but what they don’t tell you is that communication is going to look different for every couple and sometimes the things that you need to communicate about aren’t always things you would think of right away. Your spouse could get upset with you for not communicating something that you didn’t even think was necessary to communicate and vice versa. That’s why it’s so important to set expectations and figure out what kinds of things always need to be communicated and what kinds of things maybe don’t always. When I was first married it was super hard for me to talk about the way I felt about certain things with my husband because I’ve always been such a private person and expressing my emotions to others verbally is something I have a hard time doing in the way I would like to. But it just takes practice and patience and you will get the hang of it. I feel so much more confident talking about things with my hubby now thanks to his patience and kindness in helping me.
3. The way you show love isn’t always the way they feel love. This is one I am still working on for sure, but I know that a lot of the things I do to to show appreciation and love for my husband aren’t necessarily the things that make him feel most loved and appreciated haha. Marriage is about figuring out how to love your spouse in the way they want to be loved and also figuring out how to receive the love that they give you. While it can be kinda tricky to figure out, it is so worth it!
Despite the fact that the first year of marriage can be hard, it has been so fun for me and I wouldn’t trade a minute of the time I’ve had with my lover and the things I’ve learned and the ways I’ve grown. I am so grateful to have the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with and have so many adventures. I love my cute, funny smart amazing husband so much and can’t wait to see what the rest of our years together bring ❤