Quarantine Journal

I don’t know about you, but this past week was hard. I’ve been seeing content all over the Internet about staying positive and having a good routine and staying fit etc etc during quarantine, and I really do think it’s so inspiring that so many people are trying to help the world stay sane and keep going on as normally as possible. But this week I really fell off the bandwagon when it came to all of that.

When this whole social distancing thing started, I felt really blessed and fortunate to be in the position that I was. Before COVID-19 hit, my life was non-stop busyness with full time work and night school. I wasn’t doing much more than just existing from one day to the next. Any free time I had was spent doing nothing because by the time I actually had free time that was all I wanted to do. I didn’t have too much of a social life, and I spent my weekends on my phone or watching TV. But when social distancing started and first my work and then my school closed, I was suddenly forced to slow down the pace of my life, be a lot more aware of my daily actions and a lot more conscious about what I was doing to fill all of the free time that I suddenly had. I’m incredibly thankful to work for a company that is doing pretty well during this pandemic, and so I’m blessed to still have my job and to be able to work from home, which has been really nice in helping me keep sane.

The first couple of weeks of quarantine were actually amazing. Being an introvert, social distancing honestly just felt like a weight off my chest for the first little bit, because I no longer had to feel obligated or guilty for NOT socializing. Lol. It was so nice being able to go for runs with my husband, or spend more than 10 minutes a day working out (which was all I had time for before). It was amazing to actually be able to cook dinner and sit down and eat it together instead of haphazardly throwing something together and then rushing out the door for school. I loved having time to read as much as I wanted! I combed through so many books in the first few weeks, and I was able to get way more writing done than I had before. Oh, and did I mention our apartment was like 10x cleaner because we finally had time to actually clean up after ourselves and stay on top of dishes? Basically, I was living my best quarantine life.

Just listing out all of these things has renewed my gratitude for the good things. It’s so easy to forget them sometimes in the midst of all of this craziness. It’s so easy to see all of the sad and horrible things happening in the world and to let it get us down. And it’s so easy to fall into a boring routine and start to feel purposeless. This happened to me yesterday. I was so unmotivated to do anything, simply because I felt like there was no point to any of it. I was thinking about how my life and my appearance and my surroundings aren’t as perfect and aesthetic as everyone else presents theirs to be. I was looking at myself in the mirror and wanting to cry because every time my skin gets to the point that it currently is at I feel like it’s my fault for not taking better care of myself. I was feeling stuck and like I couldn’t have any hope for a future that was so uncertain. Basically, I felt like crap.

Today I made a new wellness regimen for myself. I wrote down a list of things I want to do every day for self care. They’re all super simple things like eating all three meals, drinking enough water, making sure I’m exercising. You know the drill. Stuff that tends to fall by the wayside when I get depressed. I also put in a small list of ways I want to start using my essential oils more. Because I work for an essential oil company I have about a million of them and I’m always looking for more ways to use them and incorporate them into my life but I’m generally too lazy to do so consistently. I decided that if I complete my whole regimen for five days in a row I can reward myself.

Just by doing this, I already feel so much better. Sometimes you just have to shake up your routine, or find a way to make it more motivating and fun for yourself. If you find yourself dreading your workouts, turn on your favorite music and have a crazy, inhibitionless dance party! Trust me, it’s an amazing workout, and it’s so fun that it doesn’t feel like a chore. If you are losing motivation to cook healthy meals, or to eat at all (this happens to me way too often), scroll through Pinterest for some good food inspiration. I don’t know about you, but Pinterest food boards always make me hungry. If you can’t seem to find a single good reason to get out of bed, find a reward that motivates you and treat yourself!

Life doesn’t look perfect for anyone right now, but it is a time to slow down, reconnect with hobbies that we may have pushed to the side, send some encouraging notes to friends or family members, express your creativity, and love extra on those that you are cooped up with even when they’re driving you crazy. It’s a time to connect with your deeper self and do all of the things you always used to wish you had more time for. Well guess what, now you do!

I didn’t know what to blog about today, so I figured I’d just journal about what’s been going on. Sometimes writing out your thoughts and feelings just makes you feel so much better. So, if you read this far, I want to hear how quarantine has been going for you! What is going great and what’s driving you crazy? And for anyone out there who might be reading, whether you’re still out working or whether you’re stuck at home, you are doing so many amazing things for the world right now. By staying home, we are helping reverse this virus and providing hope for the future and I love and honor you all, and send light to whoever may be reading this ❤

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